Isahai Johnson Radiates Confidence in the Face of Colorism

By Shannay Porter

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Isahai Johnson is reclaiming her power and embracing her skin’s richness after years of facing colorism.

“I found religion. Attributed to that, I [found] that the traumas that once were a stronghold weren’t so great. It caused me to actually recognize my own beauty and [appreciate] the way I looked,” Johnson stated.

The 22-year-old Jamaican first went viral on TikTok in May 2022 after posting about her journey with feeling like the ugly Black girl. “I grew up thinking I was ugly, and I started idolizing what we realized as the standard of beauty. I would tone [and] toning turned to bleaching, but I guess my melanin was so strong that it really was to no avail. I didn’t know what I was aiming for, I just knew I never got there,” she explained.

Her post garnered 5.3 million views with 1.2 million likes and 12,500 comments. Johnson received support from viewers all over the world who assured her of her beauty and others who could relate to her experience. In September 2022 she posted another TikTok about bleaching her skin when she was younger and that post received over 12,000 views and over 2,000 likes.

The St. Elizabeth native also added that her experience with being ridiculed at Hampton School, an all-girls high school in Malvern, St. Elizabeth, fueled her desire to bleach her skin. She stated, “It led me to feeling I was the problem, that if I didn’t have this skin my life would be easier.”

Johnson’s mother had lupus and would use brands such as Nadinola and Idole to fix her uneven skin tone caused by her medication. She emphasized that her mother never failed to remind her of her beauty, however, Johnson could not resist temptation. “Little by little I would steal a bit here and there, and place it on my skin. I did see results [but] none that anyone else would notice though cause it never stopped – the remarks and microaggressions,” she explained “When that didn’t work I developed imposter syndrome. I was the class clown. I feigned confidence in an attempt to cover my unjustified insecurities.”

The dark-skinned beauty explained that her immigration to Canada was the catalyst for change that she needed. “Honestly speaking, it took me leaving Jamaica to recognize my beauty. I’d have people outside of my race stop me, and tell me I was beautiful, that my skin was beautiful. And then the people of Afro descent here, females would stop me as well and call me beautiful. To Afro men, however, again I was undesirable,” she expressed.

By Isahai Johnson

Isahai Johnson in Jamaica

The women Johnson encountered helped her to feel empowered in her skin and while the men were still colorist, Johnson emphasized that the most important thing was self-acceptance. “In order for the world to accept [who] you are, you have to accept yourself. Beauty is subjective, and anyone can be the standard,” she added.

The TikToker also mentioned that colorism is deeply ingrained within Jamaican society stating, “It affects opportunities, advancement in school and in the workplace. I find that if people started loving themselves, and practiced self-awareness a lot of the issues can be resolved. Rather than seeing me as my skin color, see me as me. And stop attributing darker skin to such negative stigmas. We are not dirty [neither] are we uneducated.”

Johnson also gave some advice to those struggling with self-worth or self-love because of colorism. “The world is large, bigger than our tiny island. And if you look like me, you’re the standard somewhere. There’s a whole continent full of people to identify with and embrace,” she expressed.